Unit 4 -- Loving oneself and then extending kindness to others

Hi Everyone,

I believe my experience with this week's guided imagery was a bit skewed. I have an extremely nasty cold and with that comes a huge sense of self-pity and feeling miserable. My patience seems to be next to none as well. I want to try this one again, after I feel much better, because I loved what the guide was saying and I think it would benefit me tremendously!
As for this week's guidance, I had a rough time focusing on my body and its sensations. What I seemed to be drawn to was my sore throat, my coughing, my body aches, my swollen sinuses, etc. I found it hard to go much deeper than this.
I also had a hard time focusing on a loved one, even though I chose to focus on my husband who I love dearly! As I was trying to focus (which was hard due to coughing and a sore throat), I was thinking about him taking care of me, rather than just focusing on him as a person. I even tried deciding if I wanted him to bring me soup in a can or Chick Fil A chicken noodle soup. See what I mean? The repeated waves-crashing clip wasn't relaxing me today. Instead I actually felt chilled and closed off, simply because I don't feel good and the idea of being wet sounds miserable. The flute was nice. I actually appreciated the subtle music at times.
When it came time to focus on someone who was sick and I was supposed to breathe in their sickness and exhale with happy healthy feelings, I found myself being self absorbed and thinking of myself. Perhaps this wasn't all bad, because I was trying to give myself happy healthy focus. Maybe my cold will go away faster?
I found it...entertaining?..that when I was supposed to focus on people who I felt anger towards or didn't care for, I actually could visualize this quite easy. However, the love and kindness was not there by any means. I think I was already feeling feisty, so this was an image that perpetuated my feelings at the time.
I was happy to hear that we are supposed to do this a few more times for 2 weeks(?) because I really do feel like this would be a great exercise for me when I am feeling better and I am able to dig deep into my mind. I have caught myself, many times, focusing on the crazy parts of the day, the people that don't sit right with me, the careless remarks that were made, etc. instead of the good and positive of the day. I would love to get to the point where I had so much love and kindness towards myself, that I was easily able to extend that to people around me. I can only imagine how little chatter I would have in my head, and also, how little defensiveness I would have, if only I could send and receive the love and kindness instead.
I would recommend this to lots of people I know. I think it would be beneficial in the way that everyone would be a lot more relaxed and a lot slower in getting angry at one another. Just imagine what could happen to something like road rage, if people practiced this exercise more often?
To me, mental workouts are times of practicing various mental exercises, such as this one, in order to change one's thinking and be able to access different parts of the mind. For example, for a person who is very short tempered, practicing seeing a situation in a different way and extending loving kindness to whatever is angering the person, could help the individual react better to stressful situations. I believe after awhile the person would no longer be considered short-tempered because after so much practice, the mind would follow the relaxing and loving path it has become accustomed to, rather than flying off the handle like before.
Research has shown that with continuous mental workouts people can reach an "Olympian" status with controlling one's thoughts, feelings, and reactions. These people are also able to reach different parts of their brain to access deeper feelings and wisdom that was not previously known or understood. Along with this, people who are great at maintaining the discipline of mental workouts, research shows they are great at reaching optimal health and happiness.
Personally, I need to implement mental workouts and become very disciplined in doing them. I find myself carrying a lot of physical stress, solely due to not being able to control every situation, like avoiding accidents, not making mistakes, paying every bill early (or on time), not being late, etc. If I were to give myself the same loving kindness that I extend to others, I believe I could very easily let go of a huge amount of stress that manifests itself physically throughout my body. The ironic part is the hesitation that comes bubbling up when I think about taking this exercise on and learning how to change my thought patterns. Why wouldn't I want to be more happy and more relaxed? Yet when I think of taking on "one more thing" regardless of what it is or how it will help me, I feel tired and rundown. I find myself feeling the same way about organization. I love when things are organized and clear, however, I hesitate when it comes to putting in the time to do it. It's a self defeating thought. See! I found another thought pattern to work on for myself!
I can't wait to feel better and try this one out again! I will blog about those results, even if we are in a later unit!
Have a great day everyone! : )

Unit 3 Goals

Hi Everyone,

So this week's guided relaxation was a little crazy, and perhaps revealing? I did as the man said and envisioned vibrant colors at different parts of my body. I was completely relaxed and enjoyed the break from a crazy day. However, after purple (or violet), I started to lightly doze. The only way I can put it is that state of sleep you are in when you are still aware of your surroundings but you aren't fully asleep and yet you are dreaming. I knew my husband was at his desk working, yet, I felt like I was somewhere else (dreaming), and listening to this man's voice. I honestly have no idea what the guy said after the purple/violet window in terms of comprehending it. I do know that I was extremely relaxed and I was dreaming that I was in different countries, admiring the scenery, ordering food, etc. It was like a mini vacation! When I woke up/was done with the listening, I had a small kink in my neck. Isn't this the aqua part of the color order that talks about your purpose in life? I have been struggling with this feeling/question for months (okay years), and I thought it was interesting that it was this area that seemed to be giving me fits when I got up. Perhaps my thoughts and emotions surrounding this really did manifest themselves physically. Yikes!
As for the questions for the exercises: I feel like my physical well being is at a 6 or 7. I had a physical after almost 20 years of not having one (besides the tiny ones they give you when you are sick) and found out all sorts of things, that luckily are manageable, but I was completely clueless that this was all occurring in my body. I give my spiritual well-being a 3 at the moment. I have been struggling with faith and what I believe in, so I don't feel like my spiritual side has been very fulfilled lately. Oddly enough, just this morning I was talking to my friend about wanting to be more spiritual but not in the ways that I have been previous to this (religious). Last, I give my psychological well-being a 6 or 7. Every since having kids, I have been a wreck in terms of worrying and over analyzing everything. I need to relax more, however, I am a control freak (in terms of making sure everyone has what they want, need, etc..), so I run myself crazy, trying to please everyone. And it isn't working. Which means, I need to learn from this and stop. Ha!
As for what I can do differently physically, I can eat better and continue to try different exercises to keep myself heart healthy and happy. Spiritually, I need to make time to develop that side more and learn how to believe in something again. Psychologically, I need to say yes to more fun things and no to the mindless obligations that I seem to take on because nobody else wants to.
My goals for physical well being are to take advantage of the free exercise programs on tv (okay, I guess cable isn't free, but I don't have to pay extra for those) and try new exercises (I know I like Tae-Bo and kickboxing, who would have ever have thought that? ha!). As for spiritual well being, I am going to meditate more and see if I can find something that helps nourish that side of me. Psychologically, I am going to watch my thoughts and drop the induced drama that I seem to think up. It's silly and time consuming (and never correct).
So these are my goals and my experience with this week's imagery.
Have a super great week everyone!

Unit 2 Journey On Relaxation Exercise

This is my first blog for class, so welcome everyone! I hope by the end of this experience in class, I will be motivated to keep this blog going. It is only week two, and already I have so much to think about in terms of how the body, mind, spirit are all connected.
Tonight I tried the relaxation exercise. I decided to lay on the floor and do everything the guy on the tape requested of me. At first my mind was wandering back to my Psychology class in high school, when our teacher would walk us through relaxation exercises, and I caught myself judging the present experience, expecting it to me a lot like my high school one. As soon as the guy talked about the blood flow in the abdominal cavity and how if I willed it to enter into my arms and fingers I would feel a different sensation, I was already cut off from my previous judgments and was focused on trying the experiment. Before the guy mentioned the warm sensation in the fingers and hands, I had already felt it and wondered if that was normal of if I was just imagining it. The experience was amazing and it obviously was working, because towards the end, my husband (who had no idea why I was laying on the floor with headphones on) tapped my arm with his foot and I think I jumped about 3 feet into the air, HA! Obviously I am not to the point like the guy in our text who was present but also so relaxed that he didn't react to loud noises around him. Hopefully, one day I will be though!  So, since my first experience was a little thrown off, I think I am going to try it again tomorrow, and possibly each day for the rest of the class, just to give myself those few moments of a mental vacation. I can't wait to read about how everyone else reacted to this relaxation exercise.
Enjoy!