Hi Everyone,
This week's guided imagery brought up a lot of feelings and issues that I wasn't aware of (to this degree). When I pictured the person who I admire and respect and went through the exercises I found myself feeling somewhat reluctant and silly because I couldn't picture myself being that wise or relaxed. Although I know the person I chose has practiced for years (decades) and this is a result of all the practicing, I found it hard to believe I too could be like that. I think it came down to my ego stepping in the way. When I tried seeing the light go from their throat into mine and the light going from their heart into mine, I felt very vulnerable, like I wasn't worthy of this. My ego was flashing pictures of myself that were not conducive to the type of person I was seeing. For example, the person I admire doesn't drink. However, I enjoy having a drink with my close friends and I feel closer to my friends when we can have a few glasses of wine. I also kept thinking of things I have said, even in the past 24 hours, that were not what this wise person would engage in. For example, I was annoyed with my daughter's friend's mom, so I was telling another friend what happened and why I was so annoyed. I added a little more opinion than needed to be there. The person I honor would not have done this, or would have at least made it more productive.
So, with this new knowledge, I have a part of me that I have recognized as a potential obstacle. What comforts me is knowing that whatever this obstacle is, I will get past it if I keep up with my daily mental exercises. I don't believe there is really anything that can't be overcome with the use of mental exercises.
I had a hard time with this exercise as well. Although my mind did not flash any pictures it just was blank. I did this exercise two different times to see if I could get different results. (My mind and I have a love hate relationship). So the first time I couldn't picture anything, just utter blackness and then I felt silly trying to imagine light passing through the throat of one person to me. I think I felt uncomfortable and almost immature about it. The second time I did it, I had a hard time thinking of just one person, and could only think of God being that entity.
ReplyDeleteI do like these exercises but I think I will only use them for relaxation and not psychological and spiritual wellness.